A Life Without Coffee (or, at least...a week)

I always tell people I'm not addicted to coffee, I just like the taste. While I believe that's true, I've been having it a lot lately. Every day, in fact.

I'm a rather stubborn and independent person. The thought of someone or something besides myself having control over what I do irks me. (God is, of course, a definite exception to this...I love that He's in control). You can imagine how well my parents and I got along when I was growing up.

It is for this reason that I'm wary about ever having alcohol. (I'm currently undecided about it.) While I know, or believe, I would only ever have one glass, and I don't believe alcohol is wrong (the Bible has things to say about getting drunk, but seems to actually promote drinking alcohol in moderation) I simply don't like the idea of having something like that affect me.

And that is why I have the need to assure myself that I am not actually addicted to coffee. Starting today, and until next Sunday, I will be having no coffee, no coffee flavored things, and no chocolate covered coffee beans (which, by the way, are delightful, and I highly recommend them). I'll let you know how it goes. :)

Hope

"With them, to wish was to hope, and to hope was to expect." --Jane Austen

Hopefully.

That word has become far too common in my everyday vocabulary.

"Hopefully I'll make it to dance this week."
"Hopefully I'll get ahead on homework today."
"Hopefully I'll see you soon."
"Hopefully law school won't totally kill me." ;)

Thinking about it literally, it means 'full of hope,' doesn't it? So why is it that whenever I say it, I'm anything but?

When I say "Hopefully I'll see you soon" it's because I haven't seen you in a while, and don't know the next time I will. If I know the next time I'll see you I leave off the hopefully. I don't have to hope, I know. Same with when I say "Hopefully I'll make it to dance." It's because I don't think there's much chance that I'll be able to, and if I thought I would be able to I'd say "See you at dance" instead!

I'm not losing all hope, but I'm also not filled with it. Essentially, I'm wishing.

In Portuguese, the word for "Hope" is the same word for "Expect." When someone is pregnant, while here we'd say, 'When are you expecting?' they say instead, 'When are you hoping?'

Because for them, to hope is to expect.

I wonder if my life would be any different if, instead of thinking of "I hope" as "I wish," I thought of it as "I expect." I expect to see you soon. I expect to make it to dance. I expect to get ahead on homework. I expect to not die from school. (Well, hey, the last one is true!)

It's definitely something to think about.

Decent Exposure

We do not look in our great cities for our best morality.
Jane Austen

No indeed.
I look at all the lovely blogs in my reading pane, and I feel so incredibly blessed to know so many beautiful young men and women who are striving to spread God's word, and who are indeed, in their own small ways, prime examples of our 'best morality.' One such blog is the awesome Modestia.

While browsing Modestia today, I saw Rebecca's post on Decent Exposure. For those of you interested in modesty, and the fight that awesome and Godly women everywhere are waging against our culture's current standards of dress, I think this will be of interest.

What is Decent Exposure?
Decent Exposure is a ministry for teen girls that was founded last year by Catholic actress, designer, and speaker Jessica Rey. Jes asked me as well as some other modest-minded friends of hers to help her get this ministry off the ground last fall. We had our first program in the summer of 2009 that consisted of 4 weeks of classes about womanhood, modesty, chastity, etc. To surmise all the girls had learned, we topped the program off with an amazing fashion show hosted by actor Skylar Testa with a bonus performance from Caitlin Crosby. (Whom we love here at Modestia!) The program was more amazing than I could have ever imagined and I am so excited for this year. (From Modestia. Here is the post in full. It has some awesome information about their ministry!)

Here's Decent Exposure's website with more information:
http://www.decentexposureonline.com/

And just for the fun of it...

Here are some other awesome websites dedicated to modesty:

Pure Fashion.

Lady Rose's Modesty-Mall.

She had a womanly instinct that clothes possess an influence more powerful over many than the worth of character or the magic of manners. ~~ Louisa May Alcott

The Miracle of Christmas

The grounds for belief and disbelief are the same today as they were two thousand -- or ten thousand -- years ago. If St. Joseph had lacked faith to trust God or humility to perceive the holiness of his spouse, he could have disbelieved the miraculous origin of her Son as easily as any modern man; and any modern man who believes in God can accept the miracle as easily as St. Joseph did. ~Miracles, by C.S. Lewis

The Modesty Survey

Dress is at all times a frivolous distinction, and excessive solicitude about it often destroys its own aim.
Jane Austen

I remember when I first found the Rebelution's Modesty Survey. You hear so many do's and don't's when it comes to dressing with modesty, so it was nice to get some gentlemen's input into the matter. Especially since many of them were so down to earth about it. As one wise young man replied:
"Take these answers as advice - not a rules or regulations. It's very dangerous to get legalistic. Modesty is state of being - not what you wear." Very solid advice, indeed!

But the part of the survey that touched me the most were some of the guys encouragements to dress modestly. The first time I read these, I started tearing up. They're so sweet and beautiful. I haven't looked at these in a long time, but I was revisited them yesterday. I think I needed to hear their encouraging words.
Here are some of my favorites:


"Sisters in Christ, we men in society have miserably failed at appreciating true womanhood. On behalf of every man out there who has painted a distorted picture in your life of what a real woman is, especially along the lines of modesty, I apologize deeply. There are many Godly men out there, as I'm sure this survey will prove, that are dying to give you their utmost respect when you choose to follow God's leading in this area of modesty in your life. We back you up all the way and want to do anything we can to help you. And we ask that you do all you can to help us as we struggle through this world of sin together."

"Girls, you are so much more beautiful than the other girls in the world because you are modest. Your purity is beautiful and I find you attractive because you guard it."

"Thank you to all my sisters who seek to please God with modest clothing and behavior. You really show love and care for others when you dress modestly and do not flirt. There are some especially modest, attractive women in my church who realize that their brothers need help in this area. We men don't appreciate and thank you sisters enough for the thoughtfulness and work you put into dressing modestly. Please keep it up."

"As a young man, I have grown to appreciate and respect greatly girls who present themselves physically in a pure and Christ-centered way. Whether in dress or an attitude of modesty, God will honor and reward you for your goal and efforts to keep him as the center of your life in clothing and the way that you interact with those of the opposite gender."

"Keep going, no matter how hard it gets, keep at it, for not only are you helping your fellow brothers stay clean for their wives, but you are keeping yourself pure for your husband. It may seem like guys don't notice or appreciate, but they do, in ways you don't see."

"I understand modest attire is extremely difficult to find these days, but please don't give up! Don't spoil your inner beauty by parading your physical beauty. Godly men certainly DO notice women who behave and dress like godly women, and absolutely WILL displace themselves from women who behave and dress in an ostentatious way."

Coexist? I thought we did...

Anyone seen this bumper sticker? I see it a lot, and it bugs me. Why? Because I can't help but wonder...

What's the point?

Maybe I'm ignorant. Maybe there are skirmishes going on across America that I don't hear about, so the message this bumper sticker proclaims is needed.

But from what I can tell, that's not the case. Basically, what I get from this is that they're saying we should...keep doing what we're doing. Coexist means "to exist together at the same time."

Do we not already do this? Am I missing something here?

I think I get what they MEAN to say. We need to 'tolerate' other religions (that's what they think, anyway). As a conservative I don't exactly agree with that. But I won't get into that here.

The 'cry for action' I see in this bumper sticker (and t-shirt, poster, &c.) is in actuality just a cry for inaction... If you're going to shout a message like this, could you at least put some umph in it? Give it a purpose--make it try to change things. Please.

Pride is a Very Common Failing I Believe...

Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Jane Austen

I was going through my old scripts the other day (because I was in a pensive mood-and I do that sort of thing when I'm in a pensive mood), and I found these little thoughts written in, around, and all over the pages and covers of my Pride and Prejudice Script. I haven't read these since May, but I think they merit a re-visiting...

Without further ado:

• Opposites attract, but they must learn to meet in the middle. (E.g., Lizzie and Darcy: Darcy is her soulmate, because they both need each other- he starts out cold & proud, Lizzie starts out immature-his coldness is melted by her "fine eyes", representing her character, which is on par, and every bit as strong as his. Lizzie's immaturity (manifest in her rash judgement) is tempered by Darcy. She grows up, he loosens up. She is searching for a soulmate and refuses to settle for less. Lizzie's character is attracted to Darcy's character-only when she discovers his character to be good and true.)



• Prejudice comes from Elizabeth's fierce loyalty-almost the same reasons as Darcy's failings. E.g. Miss Bingley is an obvious snob. Therefore, [Miss Bingley's]warning [about Wickham] (a true, good warning,) is disregarded because it comes from her lips. This is prejudice, because why should she not be correct, although she is a snob? But, how else is one to judge someone and their actions, and words than by one's previous knowledge of them?
  
  
• PRIDE--Choosing not to love out of fear. Out of fear of being rejected, of not being loved back.
  
  
• Just love! "A life lived in fear is a life half lived."
  
  
• To love was why woman was created. [Ed. Note: This was written in reference to Genesis, and how Eve was created to be a companion for Adam. Adam was told to "fill the earth and subdue it" (Genesis 1: 28), but Eve was made for Adam, because Adam was lonely. God said "It is not good for the man to be alone." (Genesis 2:18) So, what did He do? He made a companion for Adam; and since He's God, obviously He's going to give Adam the perfect companion. That perfect companion was Woman. How sweet/adorable/romantic/lovely/beautiful/mind-boggling/earth-shattering/"inconceivable!" is that? Honestly, I think that's just the best thing ever.]
  
  
• Strong characters are attracted by character, not [exterior] beauty. Eyes express strength of character-windows to the soul.
  
  
• People project what they are onto other people.
  
  
• Obstinancy is his [Darcy's] true failing-perhaps like Lizzie's.
  
  
• Lizzie prides herself on being the opposite of Jane (who sees only good in others at all costs), but Lizzie prides herself on seeing all and having no qualms about criticizing it.[Ed. Note--Can I say I find it simply fascinating, delightful, delicious, and quintessentially ironic that Lizzie's real fault is pride! Truly, it is: Lizzie is a clever, intuitive girl-the cleverest and most intuitive in her circle of aquaintance. Therefore, there's a little, wee bit of pride-the knowledge that she is better than everyone else. She prides herself on her ability to read character, and her good judgment. She's spiritually on an entirely different plane than everyone else in her family and her friends, and she's fallen into the trap of pride-the mistake of thinking herself "a cut above the company," as a wise, dashing young gentleman once said. But by the end of the story, Lizzie is a much humbler character. She's still witty, clever, and vivacious; but she has learned wisdom and humility.]
  
  
• Lizzie's attraction to Wickham is a vital ( i.e., physical) attraction. Physical attraction is blind-it sees only one side of the person-the side that the person wants you to see, or the side that you wish to see.
  
  
• Lizzie feels a respect that can lead to love-one must have respect-gratitude. Lizzie does not love Darcy as yet; but then her physical and vital attraction is awakened by Pemberly. She sees a beauty & splendor of Darcy's that can rival Wickham's glamour. Only when Darcy's character was proved good did his wealth become attractive."If gratitude and esteem are good foundations of affection, Elizabeth's change of sentiment will be niether improbable nor faulty." --P&P Chapter 46
  
  
• "Never had she so honestly felt that she could have loved him, as now, when all love must be vain." ---P&P Chapter 46
  
  
• "She began now to comprehend that he was exactly the man, who, in disposition and talents, would most suit her."---P&P Chapter 50
  
  
  So there you are. I love this story-it is arguably the greatest love story of modern English literature. Jane Austen wrote a masterpiece, and it never ceases to amaze me how much richness and beauty and Truth is contained within the pages of her book. P&P is one of the rare works that is a 'classic' in the full sense of the word-it's themes are universal, undying, and are at the heart of all our stories.
  
  

"Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it."---C. S. Lewis